This was not a social experiment, but the result of necessity. My wife lost her 98 year old grandmother this past week and headed to join family and celebrate her life. My wife’s family is from Barbados (a nice perk compared to in-laws from Brandon, MB-no offense, to Brandon). However, from Calgary, the trip is a long one. To further complicate things, I was in Montreal at the annual mortgage conference when this was happening. We literally crossed paths at the airport in Calgary (me on my way home, her on her way to the Caribbean.
So, there I was with my 2 kids (aged 2 and 5), active dog and the need to be running my brokerage, especially after being away from it for 5 days. I have a great team at Mortgage Connection, so that part went off without a hitch. So, just the kids, this will be fun, this will be easy. It certainly has been fun, but it is not easy. I already know my wife is a huge part of my success; she is my constant cheerleader and support. She never complains about early mornings, my extended nights. How I am always buzzing with ideas, can be a bit high-strung and sometimes go into super mortgage mode. She just takes it in stride and takes care of things. The truth it she is much more part of any and all my successes than I even knew. I always feel blessed to have such happy kids, such a loving, inviting and warm home. I now have a much better idea on what it takes to pull this off (there is nothing like real work experience).
Some points that really hit HOME this week:
1) Never ask a mom what she did today: First off this is a thoughtless and empty question. I hate this question for anyone, but especially a mom. Instead, ask what happened today that gave you a good laugh, made you smile, or happy. After being home for a week, I was quite content to get meals in the kids, the dog walked, some outdoor play time and a bit of laundry folded. If I showered-bonus. Asking me what I did would likely result in me saying: “Well, I survived, the kids are sleeping and no I didn’t vacuum and yes we are out of milk. How was your extended business lunch and hot latte?”
2) You will miss adult conversation more than you think. Yet, talking to children is way more REAL!
3) Crafts, clay, painting, games and Lego are actually more fun as an adult then when I was a kid. How does one go about working for Lego- specifically in the product testing area?
4) Planning and a schedule is more of a suggestion than a rule: Set an alarm, get ready for school, or dance, or gymnastics with what seems like plenty of time, only to be derailed by a terrible two tantrum, or, “Where is your jacket? How is it not in the closet? It was here yesterday?” 20 minutes later, jacket found in the toy chest and now late-awesome. Oh and my coffee is sitting on the counter, nice and cold with one sip missing…
5) Never tell me a stay at home mom doesn’t have a job. They have a full-time job, with no breaks, no pay and very little respect from society (which is a complete joke considering they are raising society). Working moms you have a double whammy. How you keep the two worlds on track is remarkable-all I can say is Bravo. Now a single working mom-that is a task that is beyond me. After playing that role for a week, I really don’t know how you beautiful women do it. The older I get the more I realize women are far superior to us men. From now on I am referring to them as WOWMEN.
For more stuff like this-check out Mortgaged, Married and Minivan’d